Monday, March 21, 2011

Second Child Bonding

I posted a few months ago about the special bond I have with Mariah, our firstborn, called Fairytale Bonding, and I also wanted to write about the special bond that I have with Ambria, our middle child.

Today is Ambria's 4th birthday! I can't believe she is four already! So, as I sit her and reflect on Ambria's day of birth, it also brings me to recollect the craziness of her labor and delivery. Unlike our first child, I feel that my bonding with our second child began earlier, of course during pregnancy, but I think there was even some bonding during labor and delivery.

We did not find out the gender of baby #2. We were excited and prepared for either a boy or girl. I had a doctor appointment earlier in the day on March 20 and in the evening, we were just hanging out at the house. My husband challenged me to a game of ping pong in the basement so all three of us went downstairs. As he was getting ping pong set up, my water broke!! I was shocked and then I started laughing and ran upstairs to get ready to leave the house. We dropped off Mariah at my sister in laws home and arrived at the hospital at 9:00pm.

My contractions had barely started and I was going to walk around the hospital after we got all check in, but I stood up and my contractions got SUPER hard. I sat back down and stayed put. The contractions were fast and furious. I was excited at how quickly things were progressing. I was more excited than scared. I couldn't wait to meet the new baby!

I opted for the epidural but by the time the anesthesiologist finished, I layed back down and demanded to get checked again because I thought I had dialated more. Yup, I had. I was at a 10! The anesthesiologist was still in the room when the baby was born!! Did the epidural work?? Probably not. It didn't have time to kick in. We all screamed "It's a Girl!" and were super excited to meet our new daughter. I felt an instant connection. Ambria was born at 12:23am on March 21, 2007.

With the second child, I was more prepared for what motherhood was all about. I "knew" how I was supposed to feel. I "knew" what to do with a newborn. I was a mom, and now I was a mom again. I didn't go from not being a parent to becoming a parent like with the first child. Not that I "knew" everything there was to being a mom, but I felt...well, more enjoyment in those first moments after Ambria's birth. It was a party. I can actually say labor and delivery was fun! I was excited to take on this new challenge of having two children...and two girls at that.

Unlike the unusual delayed bonding I had with Mariah, I had an instant bond with Ambria. The first few days and weeks were more enjoyable. Do I love Ambria more because of this? Obvsiously, no, but it was just different. This experience was probably more like the "fairytale bonding" that women "expect" when they have a baby. The fairytale bonding started earlier with Ambria than it did with Mariah...and that is ok.

Happy Birthday, Ambria Faith! I love you!

You can read about how we chose the name Ambria in a post called What's In a Name.

And stay tuned for yet another post on bonding with baby #3 as I write about the bond I have with Ashlyn.

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